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Journey to Abiding - Week 3: The Confidence Within

Updated: Feb 1, 2022

As we have been walking through this journey together I have been reminded time and time again of a time in my life I lacked the confidence to be myself and share my heart with those around me. I remember one night setting in my room reading my Bible and grabbing the closest notebook I could find and filling its pages with this spring of words and feeling I didn't even know where inside of me. This went on for sometime, I would write out what God was placing in my heart to share, but I refused to share it with others out of fear. Fear of rejection and failure, I was so sure that no one would read my words that I would be over looked because of my young age.

Until one day... It was August 2016 and up until this point I had been terrified to share with anyone, not even my family. I sat down at my computer and I pulled up a Word document and I began to write, once I had filled a few pages I sat there staring at the screen. I knew I couldn't keep these thoughts to myself for much longer, it was time to come out of the shadows and be who I was created to be. I started looking for blogging websites and kept searching until I found exactly what I was looking for. After two days of editing and not telling anyone I was going to start blogging I posted my first post and Discover Beauty was born.

The post where a hit from the start, I had people all over the world reading my words and sending encouraging messages my way, yet I was still terrified. Every time I would write a post I would spends hours afraid to post it. Terrified that no one would like it or my beliefs. I remember one day writing a post that I felt was risky to post, it called out my generation and challenged them to stand up and be a voice. I knew I needed to have the confidence to put this post out there and to stand behind it. Long story short I posted it and felt a little of my anxiety melt away, however it was a comment I got on this post that fueled my confidence the most.

A day after posting I got a message thanking me for being so open about my faith and sharing my heart with the world. However, it wasn't the readers comment that has stuck with me all this time, but the scripture which they included. "Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war breaks out against me, even then I will be confident" (Psalm 27:3).

My prayer for you is that you will find your inner confidence and stand tall in who God has created you to be. I like to say its God-confidence and not self-confidence, what i mean by that is we get our confidence to be who we are from God. We all have been given an inner confidence, we just have to find it. I hope you hold on to this verse as you go through life and let it be a reminder that your confidence comes from within and the God who made you who you are.

If God can use someone like me, whose is broken and imperfect on more ways then one, He can and He will use you as well, you just have to be willing to step out and stand tall. At first your knees are going to falter and at times you may even fall, but you won't stay down. Each setback will in the end help you to stand a little taller.

My challenge for this week is that you simply take a moments this week to search for the confidence within you that God placed in you before you where even born. Remember even if you are surrounded on all sides He is still with you and your confidence will not waver if it is grounded in Him. Keep abiding and keep striving forward!

As always remember you have a God-given uniqueness!

Shalom ~ Alianna

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